- Who
are you, anyway?
- As
an actor, musician and clown (Major Conrad Flapps),
I’ve cracked up audiences in seven countries on stage, television,
radio and film for the last 25 years. As a father of two and a husband
to one, I’ve survived with self-esteem intact for the last l8.
- Whom
do you most admire, and why?
- My inner child:
he just won’t grow up, get a real job and a haircut.
- What
was one of the most memorable moments of your life?
- Clowning in Zimbabwe
on a tiny island on the Zambesi River for the chief and his tribe. It
was 95 degrees, the village dogs attacked me when I made my flying entrance,
I attacked them, and the chief took out his false teeth to go flying
with me!
- What
quality do you most value in your friends?
- A good sense of
humour, self-awareness and fresh breath.
- What
do you consider the most overrated virtue?
- Being able to
maintain a house with no dust balls.
- What
is your most cherished possession?
- My hair. It really
is naturally curly.
- If
you were to die and could come back as any person or thing, who/what
would you choose?
- Jack Nicholson
- I think he’s having a really good time.
- What
is the least favourite chore around the house?
- Sitting through
a half-hour demonstration of a new vacuum/air cleaner for the free gift
certificate.
- What
is one the biggest challenges of your work?
- Having to convince
people who aren’t familiar with my work that they should book me
because I am so terrific. Dealing with jerk volunteers. Finding the
time to create new material and grow professionally.
-
- If
you were likened to a musical genre/song what would it be?
- Russian/Gypsy/Klezmer
music.
- What
is your greatest fear?
- Being marooned
on a desert island with only Neil Diamond records.
- What
makes your laugh?
- The Larry Sanders
Show, Monty Python, my dog Tasha, old Woody Allen books, Robin Williams,
Danny Kaye and good clowns.
- What
or whom do you most dislike?
- Fundamentalist
fascism and polyester.
- What
is your greatest regret?
- That I didn’t
marry a doctor.
- When
and where were you happiest?
- Traveling/performing
with my wife in Africa/Greece in 1982, ’97, ’98.
- What
is the greatest accomplishment of your life?
- Discovering my
inner clown and having the guts to perform him.
-
- What
gives a person style?
- Chutzpah, imagination
and long inner shelf life.
- For
what in your life do you feel most grateful?
- Family who encouraged
an insightful sense of humour.
- What
is your most compulsive habit?
- Picking up carpet
dirt from shoes as I climb the stairs of my home.
- If
you could change one historical event, what would it be?
- The Holocaust
of World War II. I’ve been paranoid ever since.
- What
is your philosophy of life?
- Be
flexible, follow your passion, keep a sense of humour, be kind.
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